Poetry Post ~ "She"

paxamo,

Finding Now

Finding Now

Your hands cross the ocean of my skin

searching its depths

not needing breath

My fingers wander your fields and valleys

grass tickling their tips

your name heavy on my lips

You set your sun on my horizon

taking me into night

depriving me of your light

The moon guides my way down your path 

leaving a trail of stars

to remind me where you are

We exist merely in snapshots of time

strung together somehow

finding our way to now

paxamo,

He Waits

shadows stretched by lamplight

in stillness he watches

you walk faster, 

but not sure where

look behind you

you're the only one there

walking faster,

he hears your broken breath

and smiles

this game is his

you are the prize

running now, 

don't you know it's too late?

for wherever you go

...he awaits

paxamo,

Announcement

I am moving full-time to my website, ShannonTaylorHodnett.com. However, I'm not totally shutting things down here. I will have the occasional post......a short story, maybe a poem, or a review. But the posts here will be random and far between. I hope you've enjoyed this blog, and continue to......but I also hope you'll follow me over to STH.com where you never know what you'll find! ;)

paxamo,

Random Amazon

I am addicted to Amazon, I admit it. I'm not sure how I ever lived my life without it....y'know, the days when I had to actually get in the car and GO to the store if I wanted to buy something?

la la la...

Sometimes during my online shopping travails I come across items that:

• I never knew existed
• I didn't want to know existed
• make me wonder how exactly they made the cut for my potato peeler search results

So I decided to share five of those gems here, just in case any of you out there are unfortunate enough to have never been similarly entertained on your own adventures exploring the depths of the mysterious Amazon algorithms.
Please to enjoy:


1) The Gangsta Rap Coloring Book

This looks like loads of fun for the whole gang...just be careful which colors you use.  Brought to you by the author of "Heavy Metal Fun Time Activity Book". 

"The Gangsta Rap Coloring Book is just as it sounds: a series of images in thick black lines of the most popular gangsta rappers from hip-hop. The juxtaposition of hard-core thugs portrayed through a children's medium made this book an underground hit in Aye Jay Moreno's first, self-published edition. Now expanded from 20 to 48 pages to include even more of the music's superstars, this collection is a witty hall of fame of gangsta rap."



2) Fat Old Fred

Fred is not looking good. I'm just glad this "life form" comes with a convenient carrying bag. Imagine the looks you'd get carrying Fred around town...or if you had to roll him up in a rug.
And in Fred's previous life...he was apparently a balloonist.

"Students always wonder how CPR manikins [sic] will compare with real victims, especially those who are older or obese. This unique manikin [sic] helps to prepare students to respond to a more typical cardiac arrest event with a victim who is elderly and overweight. Features: elderly physical appearance, large body type with extra 'fat' layer, realistic head tilt and chin lift for opening the airway, and palpable and visual anatomical landmarks, including the sternum, rib cage, and substernal notch. The airway can be manipulated to simulate airway obstruction or choking situations. Also includes three mouth/nose pieces, three disposable lung/airway systems, and a convenient carrying bag."

3) Dancing With Jesus

Cover Jesus shows us his best Carleton...after all, he is the Fresh Prince of Peace. ☮  And the fact that the cover is lenticular ROCKS!
Just saying.

"Singing hymns of praise is standard practice—now it’s time to set your feet a-tapping with a collection of original dance moves inspired by Jesus and the likes of Moses and John the Baptist. Dances include: the Water Walk, the Temptation Tango, the Judas Hustle, and The Apostolic Conga. Each dance move is outlined with: how to, inspiration, and an illustration. Slyly irreverent but ultimately festive, Dancing with Jesus is illustrated in full color. Best of all, two of the dances are animated for full effect by a lenticular cover and last-spread finale, making this a truly one-of-a-kind novelty item!"

4) Teeth Magnets

Two words that should NEVER be put together.
Ever.
These make my teeth hurt...but they would be a perfect present for Jeffery Dahmer, maybe...or Ed Gein.
Why does one look like corn?

"Ideal for posting notes and photos on your fridge or other magnetic surface, these fun teeth magnets feature five white teeth and one gold tooth. Made of plastic."

5) Penis Cactus

I really don't have much to say about these...except I bet they're really prickly.

"Trichocereus Bridgessi Mostruosa "Penis Cactus" Cuttings. Each cactus is approx. 3", the powder on the cut end is sulfur which is an anti -fungal. This is for 1 cactus. These plants root very easily and are shipped individully [sic] wrapped and packed in a sturdy box. Complete with instructions on rooting, soil mixture and watering requirements. These cacti are hardy to 20 degrees. Or, they may be brought indoors in the winter and require minimal care. All cacti come with 7 day money back guarentee. [sic] Wholesale inquiries welcome."



I hope you had fun on our little foray into Amazon weirdness...if you find any good stuff on your own search of "the 'Zon", come back and leave a link here in the comments. ♥

much love

                                                                       

paxamo,

Finding & Keeping Focus

Writing is hard. Not the actual writing part...but being able to get focused and stay focused long enough to get the writing done. It's been a real problem for me lately. By nature I am very distract-able (note the excessive use of parentheticals). Some people (read: my husband) have said I might be slightly ADD, but that has never been officially diagnosed.

Just sitting here writing this post my focus has been lost to:

• barking dogs
• Facebook
• The Real Housewives of OC

Writing, or any other work that involves a computer, puts your focus at a disadvantage. While you're writing on the computer you could get stuck...decide to do a quick check on your FB feed...see something you feel you must comment on...get stuck in an IM convo---focus derailed. Or you could be busily typing away...stop to look up a word...notice that you have 23 interactions on Twitter...check all 23---focus derailed. It's hard to be on the computer and not give into the urge to wander around the internets when your writing gets laggy. Maybe the only way to prevent this is to ...write by hand.

 

My right hand just cramped at the thought of it. I know that some people do this, or even prefer it, but not me.
I ♥ my keyboard.

The only thing I've ever found that gets me focused (besides coffee, of course) is music. I can write in complete silence, but listening to music...sometimes with lyrics, sometimes without...puts me in the right frame of mind for writing.  I use movie scores a lot because of their dramatic effect. For a fight scene...a romantic scene...a haunting scene, movie scores set the mood like nothing else.
Sometimes I like to listen to the same songs I played while writing my first book. Hearing them puts me right back in the moment...writing and re-writing. I even have them grouped into a playlist called "writing focus" because I know those songs will get me into writing mode. I'm actually listening to them right now.ツ  The only drawback to the playlist is during writing lulls I tend to break out into song. This is probably part of why I have my own little tucked away space where they send me to write...and yes, very loud singing is happening now as well......don't you wish this was a vlog? ツ

So what helps you focus? What helps you stay focused long enough to get into the groove (Madonna!) and let it flow from there? What gives you the strength to fight the lure of FB and Twitter? Is that even possible? 

paxamo,

Character Counts

Or more precisely, characters count. They're arguably the most important part of any story. Plots are great and everything, but even the greatest plot ever written won't shine with weak characters.

For a reader to get into a story - to be fully engaged - they must care about the characters.  They need to identify with them at some level, or at least sympathize.  If the reader couldn't care less about a protagonist, then not even the most masterfully crafted twists and turns will save the story.

For example - if I tell you about a young boy who stepped off a street curb to the cheers of those around him - you might say that sounds like it could be an interesting story. You might want to know why they cheered for the boy, but it's likely at this point you don't particularly care.

Then if I told you it was an adorable little 4-year-old blind boy who was stepping off the curb for the 1st time by himself, the story becomes more appealing and heartwarming because now you actually care about this boy and why he's stepping off the curb. ♥

Unless you're heartless......just kidding.......ok, not really. ;o)






So whether you're writing a story that's plot-driven or character-driven, pour your heart and soul into your characters......make them your best friends forever......fall madly in love with them so readers will, too. ツ

"I think books with weak or translucent plots can survive if the character being drawn along the path is rich, interesting and multi-faceted. The opposite is not true." 

~ Michael Connelly

✱ Further reading:

Moody Writing - "A Plot Problem is a Character Problem"

Writing Forward - "Plot vs. Character: Fiction Writing"



paxamo,

Patch of Blue

"It stood calm against the storm raging around it. The thunder screamed across the sky; it slapped the clouds into a heated turmoil that flew towards the south."
~JD Stroube, Caged in Darkness

Through all the rain and storms surrounding, this little tree stood underneath a patch of blue sky and sunshine.  It seemed like a reminder to stay smiling through all the craziness around......to focus on the patches of blue in life and not the dark clouds that threaten. ♥



paxamo,

Quotes on a Theme...

I love quotes.
Sometimes I run across quotes that really strike me in some way for whatever reason.  I usually post them on Facebook or twitter ......but there they get lost in the timeline. =P
So I thought it might be a good idea to do a quote post here on my blog every once in a while. Then I can refer to them more easily......and keep getting inspired by them. =)

The theme for my first quote post is writing for an audience of one......yourself.
I'm a big believer in writing something you would want to read. If it's something you would want to read, it's likely others would, too. Please yourself with what you write and go from there.
You could be the best writer on earth......with a perfectly composed and edited book......and yet all you have in the world to offer that's different from other writers is yourself.
Your voice.
Your POV.
Your writing.

"Any writer worth his salt writes to please himself......It's a self-exploratory operation that is endless. An exorcism of not necessarily his demon, but of his divine discontent.” ―Harper Lee

“Concentrate on what you want to say to yourself and your friends. Follow your inner moonlight; don't hide the madness. You say what you want to say when you don't care who's listening.”
―Allen Ginsberg

“Gaze into the fire, into the clouds, and as soon as the inner voices begin to speak......surrender to them. Don't ask first whether it's permitted, or would please your teachers or father or some god. You will ruin yourself if you do that.” ―Hermann Hesse

“You cannot hope to sweep someone else away by the force of your writing until it has been done to you.” ―Stephen King

“Literature is strewn with the wreckage of those who have minded beyond reason the opinion of others.” ―Virginia Woolf

“The thing about a story is that you dream it as you tell it, hoping that others might then dream along with you, and in this way memory and imagination and language combine to make spirits in the head. There is the illusion of aliveness.” ―Tim O'Brien

“I never asked Tolstoy to write for me, a little colored girl in Lorain, Ohio. I never asked [James] Joyce not to mention Catholicism or the world of Dublin. Never. And I don't know why I should be asked to explain your life to you. We have splendid writers to do that, but I am not one of them. It is that business of being universal, a word hopelessly stripped of meaning for me. Faulkner wrote what I suppose could be called regional literature and had it published all over the world. That's what I wish to do. If I tried to write a universal novel, it would be water. Behind this question is the suggestion that to write for black people is somehow to diminish the writing. From my perspective there are only black people. When I say 'people,' that's what I mean.” ―Toni Morrison




paxamo,
 

2013…A Goal Odyssey

It's here…January 2013.
Still kind of feels like the future, but the future has arrived.
We survived yet another apocalypse AND the holidays.
Now all we have left is to figure out what we want to do over the next year.

...and then DO it.

I am the worst at making New Year's resolutions.  Actually I'm not so bad at making them…I really suck at keeping them.  It just seems so cliche…make your resolutions in January and break them all by spring…blah, blah, blah.  Seriously, why bother?
A year is fairly long-term…allowing more time for us to give up on our resolutions.  I think we should start setting shorter terms for those resolutions.  And maybe call them goals instead of resolutions.  It sounds less gimmicky that way…or at least it feels like less pressure.

Yeah, the goals should probably be more specific than that. They should be specific and quantifiable…no general terms…we don't just need direction, we need a destination or we're setting ourselves up for failure.  But sometimes even so-called failures can turn out to be better than we thought.  Think of all those times in your life you were devastated because something didn't work out the way you planned…then think of all the wonderful things that came into your life because it took that turn you weren't expecting.  Call it a blessing in disguise, an unanswered prayer, fate…whatever you want.  Just don't be so quick to mark down a failure on your list of goals for this year just because you didn't get where you thought you'd be.  If your goal was writing 300 pages, but you only wrote 100, that's not failure.
You wrote 100 PAGES! =)
It's not nothing…it's progress…it's success.

I read an article recently by Dean Wesley Smith that expands on this thought and is very inspiring…you can read it here.

So make your goals and I'll make mine…we'll make them reasonable…we'll make them specific…and I just might post mine here.  But only if I put it as one of the goals on my list…otherwise I'll probably procrastinate. ;o)

I hope y'all had a great time over the holidays…and I wish the best for you in the new year!

Oh, and Happy Easter!


paxamo,

Solitary Sky ~ Free!

Doomsday Giveaway!New post… #free e-book. =)shannontaylorhodnett.com#giveaway #apocalypse #MayanCalendar #doomsday

— ShannonTaylorHodnett (@shanonaryder) December 18, 2012

paxamo,

Trailer Hitch

I love book trailers......and movie trailers. Sometimes I like them even more than the actual book or movie, but that's not where this post is going.  Over the past year or so I have looked at maybe hundreds of book trailers, before and after the making of my own.  Some were remarkably well-done......others were remarkably, well......unremarkable.  And there were a few that were outstandingly bad, to the point where I began to think it might be on purpose for comical effect. ;o)

This was not a surprise to me as the books they represent run the same gamut......but no matter their quality (or lack thereof), they mostly kept with a similar format:  pictures and/or video, words across the screen, and mood music all put together in various, creative ways.  Some had narration, but not many--narration is a hard thing to pull off well.  And then there were the ones that bucked the book trailer norm...... movie-like trailers by authors with a big publishing house behind them, or plenty of $$$ to put into their production. They were amazing 〜 animation and live-action......actors & actresses......memorized lines & plenty of drama.  It was like watching a mini-movie, but without a conclusion.  I have to admit that one of them did get me so intrigued I actually felt like I had to rush out and get the book......so I did. =)

I have to say, though......there was one tiny thing that bothered me as I watched the really well-done mini-movies. They didn't feel like book trailers......they felt more like movie trailers.  They left me wanting to see the movie more than read the book.  Also, the typical book trailer leaves a lot of work for your imagination......with these types of trailers, it's all laid out for you.  It's like watching the movie before reading the book (which I don't mind doing, but I know a lot of people do).

From a creative standpoint, I enjoyed the challenge of representing my story through pictures, video clips, music, and limited wording.  It definitely was a challenge, but I enjoyed every second......and fraction of a second of it. ;o) If I had a huge budget, I don't think I would've gone the mini-movie route. The only thing I might've done with a larger budget is hire a male lead for pics & video......and maybe make a few more videos...they really are fun to do. =)

I don't want to give the impression that I don't like them.  They are hard not to like and usually pretty impressive.  I guess I'm coming off with a purist-sounding attitude with regard to book trailers......but I can't help it.  It's partly a visceral reaction for me......and I know it's all subjective......progress and whatnot. ;o)
That's why I want to know what everyone else thinks.  Is it just me?  Do you get a different reaction from seeing a movie-like trailer versus one made in the more standard format?  List three reasons why or why not in paragraph form......or you could just comment. ❤


xox paxamo,


photos courtesy of-- Copyright: Frode Evensen, Norway & publicphoto.org

Would you like a Happy Ending?

I am conflicted.

Life is not overflowing with happy endings.
So when I'm reading a work of fiction, I like having one.  I hate when a story I've become deeply involved in ends on a sad note.  I feel cheated...heartbroken...the story doesn't feel complete to me.
I realize not everyone feels this way...and an unhappy ending doesn't mean an automatic dislike from me...but I do prefer them.
All my favorite books have happy endings...or at least not unhappy ones.

When I became a writer, I had an unspoken understanding with myself that all of my stories would have happy, or "complete" endings.  I don't want readers' hearts to break at the end of my stories...I want them to be uplifted...and/or affected...tearing up in a good way, not a bad one.

Therein lies my problem.  I'm currently writing a short story that has  [gasp]  a sad ending. =(
And it's not just a sad ending.
It's a gut-wrenchingly sad ending.
And it's making me crazy.

You would think that, as the writer, I could just make some adjustments to the plot and have the story turn out less tragic...but it's not that easy.  I have tried to come up with ways around it...but the story is it's own entity now...and it's not budging.  The problem is that it's not just some random short story I thought up one day.  It's a prequel to the next series of books I'm writing after Solitary Sky.
The tragic ending has already happened inside my head...it's unavoidable.

I'd like to know what everyone else thinks.  Is a happy ending necessary?  Is a tragic end a deal-breaker?  I keep telling myself that readers will forgive me, but can I forgive myself???

I read somewhere recently that as a writer, you have to be a little sadistic in order to do all the horrible things you must do to your characters.  I don't think there's a sadistic bone in my body...maybe I'll just have to grow one.  ;o)


♥ paxamo,


✻ photo courtesy of Scott Freiheit ~ http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Comedy_and_tragedy_masks.svg

Night Writer

I am a night owl. I hate mornings (the getting out of bed part...not the amazing sunrise part). All throughout high school and college I had trouble getting to bed at a decent hour and often overslept. When I had a baby, I was one of those awful moms that let her baby stay up later than 8pm...but the bonus was I didn't have a baby that woke before sunrise. ;o)

When I started writing my book, I had a tendency to write all night long. I went to bed as the sun was coming up and my early bird husband was going to work. It seemed crazy to other people (hi, mom!)...but for me, those were prime writing hours.  Writing during the day was just not the same...and writing in the morning was out of the question.  Everything just flowed better at night when the house was quiet (except for snoring) and there was nothing else to distract me from my writing.  

Everyone I know either claims to be a morning person (like my husband) or a night person.  My mother (a definite early bird) thinks I'm the only one who does this and that I am doing great detriment to myself by staying up all hours of the night. I try to tell her that it's not just me and it's ok as long as I'm getting 8 hours (and don't schedule any morning appointments)...but seriously, it's a waste of my breath.

I googled it and read studies that say early birds are not just annoyingly chirpy people in the morning, but happier overall...and they're more successful in business because their "chronotype" is more geared toward a corporate world.  However, we night owls might have some advantages...according to this article, "...studies reveal [night people] tend to be smarter and more creative than morning types, have a better sense of humor, and are more outgoing..."

But we are woefully out-of-sync with the corporate world.  I disagree that this makes us less successful.  It just means we pursue other avenues to success, and perhaps have a different definition of success than what this article implies.

What do you think?  Are you a morning or night person?  

Early bird or night owl?

And do you really think it matters?

paxamo,

I'm a Rider

You write a novel and you're a writer...right?

Not exactly.  

Writing a novel is only the first curve of a long ride you're about to take---a ride full of ups and downs, more curves, weighted decisions, and plenty of blood, sweat, & tears. Ok, maybe not blood so much... unless you actually do punch your computer screen instead
of just fantasizing about it... but sweat and tears, definitely.
It doesn't sound like any kind of fun, much less anyone's life dream...why would someone willingly put themselves through all that stress?  I don't know the answer, but I can tell you what I think:

    --Some do it because they truly, madly, deeply love writing and would die if they couldn't write. (they are also extremely fond of hyperbole)

    --Some are propelled toward this most arduous goal by visions of $$$ that dance in their heads (ha!).
    --Some don't do it.  They crumble under the pressure and walk away.
    --The rest are most likely certifiably insane...like me. ;o)

But there does have to be some part of your sanity you're willing to surrender while huddling beneath the patchwork quilt of emotions the writing process lays over you~

• Happiness that comes from writing a really great scene or clever line that gives you chills... or hearing positive feedback from readers, reviewers, or agents... or simply from the fact that you completed a paragraph... a chapter... a whole novel! =)
• Sadness from getting your 1st rejection letter---or 53rd... or from missing all those things you used to do before you started devoting so much time to writing. 
• Fear that no one is going to like what you wrote---or even read it... fear of the literal or metaphorical slush pile... or fear that you're in way over your head and maybe you should just give up.
• Anger at losing thousands of words you just wrote when your computer crashed... again.
• Frustration with yourself at your inability to read any page of your already edited manuscript without wanting to make "a few more tiny changes"...  or at all the hours you scrounged from your schedule to spend time writing, wasted battling writer's block.
• Confusion when it comes to the decisions---some small, some huge:  Indie or trade publisher?  CS or LSI?  This agent, or the other one?  White paper or cream?   Query letter...where do I start?  What about a blog?  A Facebook page?  Do I have to Twitter?  Should I outline or pants it?  What about cover art...layout...formatting...trim size? 
• (head spinning)
• Love for the characters you created and have given up so much headspace to...for the gift of writing that has been an outlet for the deepest parts of who you are and given you the truest sense of accomplishment... and for the far-beyond-crazy life you signed up for when you typed that first word.

After more than 2 years on the ride I have completed and published my first novel in both paperback and e-book... I have written, directed, and produced a trailer for my book (see it here)... I have set up Facebook pages & Twitter accounts and I've done everything pretty much on my own (see above-referenced insanity).  Even after all that, the ride isn't slowing down.  Every time I finish a project or reach a goal, there's always another one or six waiting.  The journey I've been on the past 2 years is not over.  The ride is like a merry-go-round...all the emotions, the hard work, the late nights, every experience circling around again, over and over. 

Wanting to be a writer...or actually writing a novel is not what makes you a writer.  It's also embracing the good & bad times, the mistakes and failures, the successes and accomplishments... and the neverending learning process that is writing...aka laying your soul bare.

When you've taken that ride... and you keep on riding, you are a writer.

And a rider. 

paxamo,

Solitary Sky ~ On Sale Now!

Solitary Sky is available in paperback from amazon.com or my e-store! =D

The Kindle version is coming soon, also an e-book version on Barnes&Noble.com.  =)

I'm planning some fun giveaways on my website, ShannonTaylorHodnett.com ...stay tuned there to see what you could win and to keep updated on all things Solitary Sky! ;o)


paxamo,

Waiting for Proof

Well, I've finally finished all editing for Solitary Sky.  Truthfully, I could go back and change little stuff, rearrange sentences, add, chop, and more ad infinitum...but I had to cut myself off.  I had to be firm and remind myself it will never be perfect and I don't want to spend the rest of my life editing.  (O.O)

Tuesday of next week I will get my proof copy and if all is well, SolSky will be released mid to late next week. If I have to make changes (god forbid) and send it back there will be more of a delay.  Obviously Tuesday I will be able to give more specific info. ;o)

The whole process of writing this book...finishing it and going through all the details of getting it published has been such a crazy experience for me.  Crazy because it has encompassed so many different emotions from the highest highs to the lowest lows.  It's been a real education not just in the literal sense, but also in the discovery of who I am here at the beginning of my 5th decade of life...as well as who I was always meant to be.

The journey is of course ongoing, but I'm taking what I've learned with me...and hoping the crazy ride never stops. =)



paxamo,

Almost There

Just thought I would pop in for a quick update.  The cover is almost finalized...the formatting is done...I just have to wrap up a few details next week--then if everything goes smoothly, the book will be released before the end of October! =)   I will post the release date as soon as I know...which should be sometime next week. ;o)

Until then, here's a sneak peek at the cover and a bonus picture of Lilah:

paxamo,

Progress Report

No, I have not been ignoring my blog for the past 2 weeks...well, not intentionally anyway. ;o)

I have been working like crazy to try and get this formatting done...also final editing as I go along, which is what's taking so long.  I had no idea it would be such a long process. =P    Actually it hasn't been that long...for at least 10 of those days I was ill so nothing got done on those days...still, I'm finding that 10 pages can take me 10 hours to finish...and there are over 300 pages. =P

...sigh...

Still, I'm feeling much better now (knocking on wood) and I'm working my as--butt off to get all the formatting finished this weekend ...I'm already near 200, so I hold out high hopes! =)  
Also hope to finish the cover this weekend...I'll post it here as soon as I'm done. 

So around the middle of next week I'll post with more specific info on the release date...see you then! ;o) xoxo



paxamo,

Release Date, TBA

Well, today was supposed to be the day that Solitary Sky would be released, but unfortunately it's not happening. =P
The release is still going to happen...and still in September...but it has been delayed just a little.

Formatting issues along with being ill for over a week now has held things back a bit...but it's life, this is what happens.  To be honest, I kind of expected this would happen.  In the back of my mind when I announced the book was set to be released 9-10-11, I sort of thought in my head "tentatively"...I think I even actually said tentatively at some point.  But I am feeling better now (knock on wood) and I'm very eager to make the release announcement as soon as possible.  I'm actually very close to being ready...I will post updates on my progress here and on twitter and I'll be able to give a definite release date soon...maybe sometime this week.  =)



paxamo,